Quote:
FROM THE DESK OF, THE CHAIRMAN,
CONTRACT AWARD COMMITTEE, NIGERIAN
NATIONAL PETROLEUM CORPORATION.
E-Mail: ****
With Much Respect,
This is to bring to your notice that the contract executed by William Bryant has since been approved for payment to him.Unfortunately I learnt that he died on the 4th of February 2004 in the planecrash of Alaska Airlines flight 261 alongside other passengers.The payment of this contract was approved since last April, 2009 with hopes that the next of kin to William Bryant will come over and claim the fund. Since his death and since the contract was approved for payment, we have been expecting his next of kin or any family member to come and claim his contract fund but nobody came up. After waiting in vain for his relation or next of kin to come and claim the fund I therefore decided to contact you so that you can stand as his next of kin and claim the contract fund that has been approved to paid to him. I took the decision so that both of us will share the fund instead of the money being lost to top government. The total amount is $26m .
Engr Shola Williams, Chairman Contract
Award Committee Nigerian National
Petroleum Corporation (NNPC).
Now obviously we should reply as a family member of poor William Bryant to claim the fund. I was thinking of his distant niece Lara Bryant, who has been on a long expedition in the Andes, wrestling yeti's and uncovering ancient civilisations, and only recently received news of his unfortunate death. We should probably also request something from this "chairman contact". Perhaps some sort of sentimental proof of his death?
Help me out here. Make this story awesome.|||To me, it seems that Engr knows that you aren't next of kin, but wants to scam the money with you from the ebil guverment. Have to think about this...|||Quote:
To me, it seems that Engr knows that you aren't next of kin, but wants to scam the money with you from the ebil guverment. Have to think about this...
Because of that, it's more fun to play the so-many-removed-kin of that poor fellow.
Something in the lines of: What a coincidence that you happened to write me, as the last remaining member of the family. And continue with, I will most certainly not share with you, as it belongs all to me. And ending with: All my gratitude goes to you for delivering that money in it's entirety to me.
Or something like that. The reason for not knowing about the death of that second-to-last family member, I think Rob made a good start there (wrestling Yeti's in the Andes!)|||I would include, as well as being a distant family relative, that you are a considerable shareholder in companies with joint ventures with the NIGERIAN NATIONAL PETROLEUM CORPORATION and you are displeased with Mr Williams' handling of company money and intend to report to the authorities unless you see a great shift in his attitude.
I'd also say he is sullying the name of Umaru Musa Yar'Adua with this type of business and have a clear mind to discuss this with the Mutawalli upon your next visit to Nigeria. IP address, geolocation and time of email are at your disposal and you will have no mind passing them along unless this matter is dealt with in an expedite fashion.
That should get some giggles!
-Art|||Or you could claim that William Bryant faked his death to avoid taxation and is living under a different name in Mexico. Go on to explain that you would appreciate assistance in transferring funds there, but that William's whereabouts have to remain secret.
They'll be like... so... do I drop this one, or do I continue with it?!?|||That's also a pretty original twist, William Bryant is living in Mexico under his new name of Serge Mustachio, together with his new found Mexican wife. Perhaps we could write as a CIA agent, who was tasked with providing William Bryant with this new identity, after he assisted the CIA in unraveling a massive smuggling operation of illegal Nigerian porcelain elephants filled with cocaine.
Now that they have some how found his email adress, the CIA agent will have to help William Bryant and the sender of this fishing scam adopt a new identity. We ask them to meet with the CIA agent at an absurd location somewhere in Nigeria to transfer the funds, while the CIA agent makes sure that all the documentation is ready. All he'll need is a photograph of the guy, so he can provide false ID's.
Cocaine-filled porcelain elephants is gold!
|||Quote:Or you could claim that William Bryant faked his death to avoid taxation and is living under a different name in Mexico. Go on to explain that you would appreciate assistance in transferring funds there, but that William's whereabouts have to remain secret.
They'll be like... so... do I drop this one, or do I continue with it?!?
Alternatively, he's in the Witness Protection Program, and all correspondences need to be cleared by the Justice Department.|||Quote:
Alternatively, he's in the Witness Protection Program, and all correspondences need to be cleared by the Justice Department.
Hahahaha!
Oh I like where this is going. I'm not sure if we'll actually get a reply back after sending something of that caliber. Keep it coming guys. 
|||No see, if justice is involved, the person will surely back off.He's hiding from justice in Mexico under the name of Serge Mustachio, after almost being caught in a massive smuggling operation of illegal Nigerian porcelain elephants filled with cocaine.
We ask them to meet at a safe neutral location like Nigeria to transfer the fund.
(thx Rob for ideas)|||I think you should just give him your information and collect your share of the $26,000,000! How daft are you!
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